Posted by: cornvillenutmeg | December 5, 2017

On Reserving Judgement


“…the future becomes present, the present past, and the past turns into everlasting regret…”

Glass Menagerie, Tennessee Williams 


       The website has this to say about Alabama’s age of consent laws: “The age of consent is sixteen. With parental consent, parties can marry at age fourteen. However, this parental consent is not required if the minor has already been married… Common law marriage is recognized.” 

     Speaking of himself at the age of 32, candidate for the U.S. Senate from the state of Alabama Judge Roy Moore said, “I don’t remember dating any girl without the permission of her mother.”  The year was 1979.

     On November 4, 1979, 63 Americans were taken hostage in Teheran. I’m sure I didn’t notice, but I can’s say with certainty.  All I know is that I was likely in the morning or afternoon or evening, doing one teacherly supervisory duty or another.  On Saturday, August 9 of that year, in Brighton, England, the first nudist beach on the UK was established, and I wasn’t there.  Farrah Fawcet turned 32 on February 2nd.  Inflation was 11.2%.  The DOW ended the year at 838.  My red Ford Fiesta cost $4,400.00. I do remember I liked it.  None of that data did I recall; I found them all on the internet, of course.

     I think about me in 1979 and mostly I cringe.  Too much of that me I find shameful.  Had I been then as wise, sensible, empathetic, and rational as I am now, I think, or perhaps it should be, I hope I would see that me in a better light.

     The idea of a thirty-two-year-old dating a fourteen-year-old is repulsive.  I am mindful, however, that the year is 2017 and I am 72.  So, being today far wiser, more sensible, empathetic, and rational than I was then, I reserve my judgement.  I recommend that for those whose capacity for angst is at the bursting point.




  1. Sorry dear old friend, I can’t reserve judgment. Having been touched against my will by a much older man when I was in my early 20’s (and married!) I can tell you it is a horrid experience and one you never forget. It doesn’t matter what the age of consent is if you are not consenting. Let’s not forget that the person we’re discussing was BANNED from the mall where he trolled for teenagers. There are some things we are duty bound to judge, no matter what our politics are. And yes, I feel the same way about Bill Clinton.

  2. So very sensible–and unusually objective! The current age believes it is the paradigm of good sense–and the appropriate measure of behavior through all time. Nonsense! We are, today, a moment in the continuum, with a good bet some years from now that we have over swept the rational balance between accuser and accused. May Judge Moore find his place in court–right after he has had his day before his peers at the election box!

  3. It is really easy to pass judgement on others without first walking in those others’ shoes. I don’t mean that for horrible things like murder, but for situations where you should be in that person’s world. As a 14 year old, a shy 14 year old, I thought my cousin’s friend was really cute. He was probably in his mid-to-late twenties. So would another 14 year old Find a 32 year old man attractive? Surely, especially in 1979, there would have been a lot of naivete on the part of the 14 year old but not the thirty-two-year-old. But who is to say what was in the mind of the older gentleman? Especially having grown up in the south. I believe there were shotgun weddings for certain infractions including the kind you know I mean.

    Weren’t you a movie star in 1979? 🙂

    • That would be 1969, although star is more than a stretch.

  4. I cannot recall the original Latin: “Different times, different customs.”

    Merry Christmas! At least we won’t have Judge Moore to kick around anymore….

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: